无话可说

心理的难处真的很难说

觉得自己根本都配不上你，每次都是我把你弄到不开心

我真的不知道要这么办，只可以静静的

我们两个真的可以一起吗？

还没一起就那么多的架吵不完

我真的很担心，担心我们的一起会是个不好的结果

我知道你的心一定是很伤心

看你刚才的眼神觉得自己很像坏人

不该继续一样

你说过要珍惜这段很难的感情

但我累了，累到自己不想解释任何东西

累到还要想你的感受，单身让我不感受到哪些

所以我才要你等两年

爱你又这么样？

有时会想要放弃，但不舍得

我真的是你要找的吗？

看你每次吃醋，不开心，你不辛苦吗？

我的心会痛，痛了又这么样？

那个伤口永远都在那里

我只希望你开心

要你的体谅

这次可能是我的不对 (对不起）

但我就是不要你想那么多

不要怀疑，去相信

相信我对你的感情

就单单这样的照片就可以让你那么疯

那我永远只可以困在一个格子里面，一直到达不到我想要的不是吗？

你明知道做这一行会有风险，那为什么你不能体谅我呢？

我不告诉你，就是要让你不要知那么多，这样你就不会像现在这样

你只要知道我没做错事就可以了不是吗？

而且那是很久以前的了，我不是答应你不会有下次了吗？

说到底你就是不相信

你要我这么把心交给你呢？

算了，我无话可说了

我会再考虑我们之间的事

希望你不要想那么多，好好准备考试吧~

心

如果有一天发现你对他有感觉了

结果他一句很介意，你会这么办？
我心本来想交给他了，但他那一句话打断了我想要给的
对自己很没信心
我的心又再一次的被锁的更深。

我希望他开心就好。

其实我的心少少的被他感动到了

但心告诉我他会找到比我更好的

因为我不是想像中那么好，也可能出了社会的人想法一定会改变

可能我自己也不相信会有那么一个人

我还是很害怕的说

突然一个人跟你说他会给你幸福

你会相信吗？

我现在只觉得只要身边的人开心就可以了

我可以不用紧

我就是这样~

噢对了，最近的我过得很繁忙又充实。
希望你们和我一样~

Yesterday event @ Tropicana City Mall for Amber Chia Academy 2nd Anniversary 2012

Photoshoot for H&M (MMM) for Tongue & Chic Mag 

又来了？？！！

这几天发生太多事情了

我不知道我的生活到底要有多精彩

我只觉得我不要过回以前的生活

我再也不要了

为什么，为什么？

我要求的那么小，为什么不会实现？

小小的幸福不能吗？

能相信幸福吗？

我不敢去想

我很害怕

我不要以前的生活

我不要

我能够坚持，强壮到何时？

我能够忍受到吗？

我还是很害怕

不敢去想

谁能帮我？

又要承受很多不想知道的事了

坚强

Blog 我很久没写你了，应该有三个星期吧。

心理很多话想说，但又说不出，只好用写的。

我不懂何时我那么的独立那么的坚强，只知道太过独立是一件很不好的事。

什么事情都自己再承受，自己去面对，不敢跟人说，因为只能靠自己，不可靠别人~

连自己想开口跟妈妈说我有困难，是多么的难开口，不再伸手要钱，不要靠他们~

我很痛苦每天都面对同样的问题，把自己不够吃，不够用，自己的学费已经是一种压力了，

我还能够撑下去吗？已经很累很累了，不够睡，不够的体力，不够的精神，多么希望有36个小时的生活。。

其实心里告诉自己“你可以的”，“你要加油”，“陈慧颖加油”，“问题不大，可以面对的”，每次都说这些好让自己安慰一些，其实我没那么的坚强，只是独立让我变得坚强，现实当中本来就没那么容易，我成长在一个平凡不有钱的家中，总是觉得不够好，身在福中不知福啊，这是我爸告诉我的，我一直以为事情面对了，就不会有事的，哪知道接一个又一个来，不知何时会停止

我心想人存在着世界上到底有什么意义，难道只能吃，睡，喝，赚钱，成长？

一天一天的长大，一天一天的面对事实，一天一天的不再单纯，一天一天的面对残酷，我的人生到底是什么？难道只是追求那么一点点的梦想？

我现在只能忍，只能坚强，只能用我一生的精神已体力去做我现在想要的梦。

从小的时候我本来就很坏，很自私，打同学，应该这么说，爸的外遇，家庭分裂，关爱少了，过了10岁才懂事，就没让妈妈担心过我是否变坏，有没有滥交，自然而然就变成这样

我学习到了忍让，坚强，独立，如果可以出一本书叫做我的人生，我会写得很精彩～

坚强。独立

26 Aug Birthday ♥

Before 12am to 26 Aug, I and my friend was going to KLCC countdown my birthday. It is fun and memorable for me. ♥

 I'm now officially 21 years old. I hope that I'm forever 18, but is impossible. Haha... Celebrate with my family ♥

My family celebrate with me, my younger brother not in. 

 They earlier celebrate my birthday, thank you they all and especially the Tiramisu cake, I really love it. Hope I can find out what cake is that. Haha.. 

 My 21st Birthday presents, Thank You so much ♥

Oh ya, one more thing is Astro Promo is finally out. Check it out~

Miss Astro Chinese International Image Promo 2012/2013
Miss Astro Chinese International Promo (casting) 2012

Future Space Bridal~

Thank You Zust Professional Photography shoot this for me.

Photographer: Samuel, Elton and Stanley

Thank you Makeup Puzzle for the make up.

Make up artist Christina and her make up team

Thank you the designer Amanda Kuek, her great design. Hope to see her new design soon~

Holiday Trip 7 days 6 night

When I was 16 years old, I with my mum and brother shift to KL and continue my career. I stayed here about 6 years already.

 It’s been so long never back to Sabah, Kota Kinabalu. But this time 12 Aug I went back to K.K alone.

I met all my primary and secondary school friends. I met new friends too. Even some of them I did not take photo with you but you always in my mind. I will never forget you. 

And finally I met my father too; I almost forgot what his face look like. He became darker and more skinner. He totally changed, because I never saw my dad in such situation. Argh, never mind forget about it, now I am writing about my holiday is not about him.  

Anyway, I enjoy my trip a lot and am really a memorable for me.

I would like to say thank you to all my friends because they still remember me, and especially my BFF she bring me out and there. I really appreciated.

Here come the pictures~

 This place is Sunset Bar, I'm waiting the sunset~

Pulau Sapi~ I went there to snookering and play water games

(Agnes Keith House- a place that can high tea with friends) This is my BFF, she's the one who bring me all the places. Miss her~ Thank you so much~

 

At last I want to say thank you to my friend who give me this. And I appreciate our friendship. Thank you so much~

Once again, my one week trip I really enjoy it. 

Update ♥ Holiday

It has been so long never update my blog already.

I finally finish my exam but a big trouble is I not really do well on my last paper. I hope it can pass. Argh

By the way, I have time to get a rest that is holiday... Hooray~ This can make me happy back.

It is really a good timing for me, because recently no shows after exam.

I bought my own ticket to travel alone, is the first time I bought my own ticket so happy.

Seriously, this time travel alone a bit excited because I no need to care about others thinking, I just do whatever I want. Haha

My family and friends please don’t worry about me; I will take care of myself. Just wait me back, is only a week.

After I back I will update my blog again, it will be a nice trip for me. Just wait and see.

Enjoy Yours Holiday!!~

After exam, pretty again~ LOL

Fashion Show

Recently did a lot of shows

The biggest show recently did was the MODA 22nd Anniversary Fashion Shows and Malaysia International Jewelry (MIJF).

Now i would like to show some pictures in MODA showcase.

 

YODA the left, MODA 1st outfit the right from Alexandra

 

The 2nd Outfit

My third outfit from Keith Kee Couture

Last outfit From Radioactive with Wilson tan and Isaac Ong (SUPER MODEL)

 After Show we hang around and take photos

MIJF Show with Jennifer Foh and Miss World Malaysia Cloe Cheng

选。择

这几天我忙到自己都不够睡，皮肤也越来越差了。

不懂为什么要让自己那么的辛苦，选择放弃不就好了吗？

人就是那么爱选择麻烦。。

今天有个人竟然说出我心里一直想要的东西，从来都没人能说出我的心声。

唯有你~

我真的有感动到，差一点就掉泪了，幸好我演示的好。

真的很谢谢你一直都帮我，我真的很感激，真的很珍惜现在的我们。

我只能说放弃吧，等只会让你辛苦，你还有很多的选择。

不想你难过，不想你想太多，不想你辛苦。

只可以说谢谢你~

朋友。相信

朋友究竟是什么？

朋有之间的信任有那么难吗，为什么要搞到那么疆呢？

难道就是有一个污点了，就无法原谅了吗？

3年半了就因为这样而逃避。。 

我明白你的感受，但是我不想你用逃避来决绝这个问题~

我很伤心，伤心的是你不通知我们，伤心的是朋友之间变成这样。

原来我们在你心目中，是那么的可怕，那么的压力。

希望你会快乐哦，就算有人生气你一定要坚强啊~

加油哦！！ 

Three days 2 night trip ♥~

In this few days trip at Sibu, Sarawak, i very enjoy and happy~

I met new artist friends~ 

 Check in the hotel, of course need to photo 1st~

  Penny Tan (Artist and Singer) click in her page to know more about her~

 Keith Valentine, Amber Chia, Penny Tan, Ryan (Mc artist) Click in and like their page~

After that, we went to Sibu, BABA SIAM and eat~ Their restaurant is a bit like Thailand felt~ The food there is AWESOME!!

Enjoy~~ Miss Sibu, Sarawak but i more miss my home town Kuching~

Finally my eyes are getting better. Thank you everyone wish me healthy body.

Hope it will recover by this week because I need to use my eyes and see the stage and walk. LOL

This end of June and first week of July, I would be very busy…

My entire schedules pack together, especially assignment due date, test 2, and my shows, I really hope I can handle it, is really stress and busy for me.

But the most important is my health; I need to taking care my full body. This is my precious.. 

Oh ya, this Saturday I will be going to Sibu, Sarawak to work. 

So happy, I can go back my place Sarawak but not my hometown Kuching. Hehe.. 

Happy Happy.. 

Enjoy the weekend to do show and assignment~~!!! 

The Pain

I really unlucky this few days, busy all my works, assignment and test. Now my eyes swollen and have eye infection. 

About a week cannot wear contact lens and make up, then how I suppose to go work with a swollen eye? 

Suffer the eye pain and do things slowly.

Some more this sat I got to outstation to do show. HOW???

I hope it will recover within these five days. Seriously so pain and can’t even open my eyes clearly.

Jesus please help me to cure my eye, thank you Jesus, Jesus name we pray AMEN! 

Update Update ~

 Designer :Bryan Siew. I love his design, hope to see more his work~

 With my babesss, Amanda.C, Me, Wafa~ 

My first group magazine shoot for Feng Cai's Magazine, all professional models except me~ haha ><

 The boy shoot of me

Creepy Visitors with Amanda. C

 Individual Creepy style

 Designer: Yein Yi

Finally i can update some of the photos to let everyone see. Recently shoot a lot my portfolio for modelling purpose. Enjoy the photos~